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(Not) The Meanest Thing She Ever Said

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I was kayaking around the water outside of my house when I felt my phone buzz and saw it was my mom calling.

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Normally I'd have my phone on silent and wouldn't dare put down my paddle to take a call from someone out on the open water --

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But she'd been going through a particularly bad bender recently and honestly, I was always afraid someone was calling me from her phone with bad news.

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"Sammy?!" she said, sounding desperate, "I just called to tell you something. If you don't lose weight soon, Ryan is going to leave you and start *seeing other women."

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You might think I stopped paddling to cry into my blue Costco life jacket until there were no tears left, right?

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I didn't shed a tear.

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I distinctly remember saying, "Mom, you really shouldn't say that. I'm kayaking, I'll call you later," and feeling guilty for abruptly ending our call. That was probably the most I'd ever 'stood up' to her in my life.

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I stabbed the water, cutting through the waves until my shoulders burned like fire, and started paddling.

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I've pretty much never stopped since.

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I caught up to my husband, Ryan, in his yellow kayak and I'll admit -- a thought played in the back of my mind, "is that true? Is she right? I know I've looked a little haggard since my dad died... maybe he does think that..."

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I didn't cry when my mom said that to me not because I'm tough or made of stone -- but because it was far from uncommon or the meanest thing she'd ever said to me.

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I was used to it.

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I'd tried throughout my life to twist and bend myself into a shape that wasn't mine to hold, hoping that doing so would make her love me, take care of me, or finally think I'm good enough.

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When I started my business, I (accidentally) did the same.

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Maybe if I went above and beyond for customers... they would think I'm worthy.

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If I did everything perfectly and never stopped hustling, maybe I could control the outcome of what felt so wildly out of my control.

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Perhaps if I figured out the algorithm (which sort of feels like a narcissistic mother itself) the way I'd figured out how to take care of an addicted parent... maybe I'd be successful and seen...

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Which would then bring up a fear of actually being seen, because that wasn't very safe where I grew up.

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When I got my Big 5 book deal the day my mom died, I knew I wanted to write a book about how to build and grow an online business even if you've struggled (or struggle) with these things.

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If you've not felt seen, heard, taken care of, loved unconditionally, etc. in your life --

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It will show up in how you do business.

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You will spin your wheels trying to build a business that's:

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🤪 too focused on making other people happy

🫣 doesn't gain traction because you're too afraid to be seen

😵‍💫 suffocating from your desire to make sure everything is perfect

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This is why I wrote my book When I Start My Business, I'll Be Happy -- I teach you the marketing strategies I've used to build and maintain a multi 7-figure business for 8 years. But I also address the elephant in the online business room:

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Where you've been impacts how you show up.

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In my book, I'll teach you:

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• my Big 3 content strategy that will have you putting out less content, with much bigger impact
• how I built this email list full of 46.2k+ engaged, on-target subscribers
• how to create a product or service that people actually want & that sells more consistently
• my exact funnel strategy to consistently pull in qualified future customers

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📚 Pre-order my book now→​

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Once you order, click here (scroll down to "How to Get The Bonuses" section) to get immediate free access to my brand new email list builder course -- The Ultimate Email List Growth Toolkit.

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In it, I teach you how to easily gain 1k subscribers on your list using proven strategies that helped me build my 46k email list (ABOUT LEGAL STUFF).

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You'll also get a seat inside my No-BS Bookclub this May, where I'll walk you through each section of the book so you implement what you learn in 4 live 90-minute group sessions with me.

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Hit "reply" and let me know if you feel a little more seen with this email today, Reader.

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🥳 PS. Just 28 days until my first book hits bookstores everywhere -- wild 🤯 Pre-orders are crucial to a first-time author's success. If my work has helped you, consider it a $30 tip to purchase my book now→​

*She didn't say "seeing" but this email would get marked R-rated if I put what she actually said...

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🎙️ TRUTH TIME You Could Have 10K Followers & Make $0 If you think you need more followers until you can start making sales in your business -- think again. ​ Followers do NOT equal money. You don't need more subscribers on your email list (unless you have 0 lol) or on IG to start making sales. ​ Give me 16 mins and in Part 3 of the Happy Trap series I'll show you: why having lots of followers doesn't convert to sales #s what you can do to make more sales without gaining another follower how to make more sales with a small audience ​ ​📽️ WATCH PART 3 HERE→ Why More Followers Won’t Fix Your Business—But This Will [Happy Trap Series #3] or ​🎧 LISTEN TO PART 3 HERE→ Why More Followers Won’t Fix Your Business—But This Will [Happy Trap Series #3] ​

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🔗 Links You'll Love

🎙️ I got to chat with Farnoosh Torabi on her award-winning podcast, So Money, about how to build a business without losing yourself. LISTEN HERE→​

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💰 Listen to my interview on Marketplace's Financially Inclined podcast with host, Yanely Espinal on entering your entrepreneur era. LISTEN HERE→​

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