On Finding Your Fans (& actually listening to them)
I don't know about you, but I can be the meanest person to myself I know.
🏆 If they had an Oscar for it, I'd win Best Director of Insults and Best Producer of Stories That Make You Sound Like an Awful Human Being.
A few months ago, an Ultimate Bundle®️ customer sent me a handwritten note. I love snail mail, btw!! My address is at the bottom if you want to be pen pals.
It was hard for me to take in what she wrote. That I'd changed her life, impacted her in ways I would never know, that my product allowed her to leave her job and help people like I helped her.
I tried to take it in. Not only that, someone had gone out of her way to send this to me -- in real, non-AI-generated handwriting, no less! -- but that she felt this way about my work.
It's funny how easy it is to look away from moments like these, but how hard it is to move on from comments telling me how ugly or stupid I am (thanks, negativity bias!).
Have you seen the new Netflix doc, Marty, Life is Short, about Martin Short, one of my favorite comics and fellow grievers?
In it, they tell the story about Marty's 1986 film, Three Amigos. The film was considered a commercial flop.
But it had a 'small' yet mighty fanbase of people who loved it. I mean, really loved it. Like they would have written them handwritten notes and everything. Over time, it ended up becoming a cult classic.
In the doc, Marty recalls how fans approach him to tell him how much they loved Three Amigos. But he would wave them off saying, "but it was such a flop!"
All he could see was Hollywood's definition of success.
He couldn't soak in that to them, the people who really matter; he was a major success.
So as I stood reading that very kind note from my customer, I tried to swat away all of the thoughts popping up like, "you're falling behind!" "you're not good enough!" "your Instagram should be growing more!" "your email list should be growing more!" "you didn't sell enough books!" that I hear so often in the dark.
I stood with a hand on my heart, appreciating the care and effort this person took to reach out.
How often do we feel this about someone, but don't take the time to tell them? I can think of fifty notes I should write right now.
Who cares if I don't have a New York Times bestselling book or a podcast heard by millions around the world yet?!
I've got my own una amiga.
I'd rather listen to her than the meany in my head, any day.
Can you relate, Reader?
Maybe you haven't hit Hollywood-levels of commercial success in your business yet. But I bet you have a few amigos who really love what you do.
Hit "reply" and tell me how this resonated. And if you're choosing to listen to your amigos today instead of the meanie in your head (or your DMs if you're lucky!), too.
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🎙️ ON YOUR TERMS®️
I'm sorry, but someone had to say it
I'd apologized one time too many for simply existing in the bread aisle of Trader Joe's when I snapped.
I'm so done apologizing for everything, I thought.
In this episode, I'm talking about saying sorry for everything, feeling bad for existing sometimes, and working with that part of ourselves that wants to stop saying sorry and start saying, "I'M HERE!"
🎧 LISTEN HERE→ I'm Sorry, But Someone Had to Say It (On Apologizing For Everything)
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